I love to talk about nothing. It’s the only thing I know anything about. [to Alice]
You get a reputation for answering phones and all they do is ring. [Ian Reed: You might want to try answering your phone.]
You assert a fabulous moral conscience. This adherence to unwritten law, yet, time and again, it devastates the people you claim to hold dear but you don’t stop. Seems to me your conscience has killed more people than I have.[to John]
The media don’t care if it’s lies, as long as there’s a good story.
I’m not apologizing for what’s happened, I’m regretting what’s to come.[to John]
Do you not worry you’re on the devil’s side without even knowing it?[to Ian]
You’re the only person I ever knew who always told me the truth. Come what may. You never lie to me.[to John]
You want to know the real tragedy about marriage? Women always think men will change, but they don’t. Men think women won’t change, but they do.[to John]
Watch now on:
You might want to keep your hands in your pockets. Reduces temptation to touch anything.[to Justin]
Women don’t go speed dating for sex, they go for a relationship.[to Justin]
When we’re scared, we don’t think straight.[to Jenny]
When it comes to seasoning, I’m like Jamie Oliver. I just rummage around the cupboard, just see what I can find.
