Better Call Saul is an American television drama series and spin-off of Breaking Bad created by Vince Gilligan and Peter Gould. Set in 2002, Better Call Saul follows the life of petty lawyer James Morgan “Jimmy” McGill, six years before his appearance in Breaking Bad as Saul Goodman.
In addition to Bob Odenkirk starring Jimmy McGill (Saul Goodman), there are Jonathan Banks as Michael “Mike” Ehrmantraut, Michael McKean as Charles “Chuck” McGill, Rhea Seehorn as Kimberley “Kim” Wexler, Patrick Fabian as Howard Hamlin, Michael Mando as Nacho Varga, Giancarlo Esposito as Gustavo ‘Gus’ Fring, and Tony Dalton as Lalo Salamanca.
Here are the best Better Call Saul quotes, along with Jimmy’s funny jokes.
Getting arrested that makes people look guilty, even the innocent ones, and innocent people get arrested every day.Jimmy McGill, S1.Ep1: Uno
Lawyers… We’re like health insurance. You hope you never need it. But, man, oh, man, not having it… No.Jimmy McGill, S1.Ep1: Uno
The only way that entire car is worth 500 bucks is if there’s a $300 hooker sitting in it.Jimmy McGill, S1.Ep1: Uno
Only two things I know about Albuquerque. Bugs Bunny should’ve taken a left turn there. And, give me a hundred tries, I’ll never be able to spell it.Jimmy McGill, S1.Ep3: Nacho
I’ve known good criminals and bad cops. Bad priests, honorable thieves… You can be on one side of the law or the other. But if you make a deal with somebody, you keep your word. You can go home today with your money and never do this again. But you took something that wasn’t yours. And you sold it for a profit. You’re now a criminal. Good one, bad one? That’s up to you.Mike Ehrmantraut, S1.Ep9: Pimento
People don’t change. You’re Slippin’ Jimmy. And Slippin’ Jimmy I can handle just fine.But Slippin’ Jimmy with a law degree is like a chimp with a machine gun. The law is sacred! If you abuse that power, people get hurt.Chuck McGill, S1.Ep9: Pimento
The fallacy of sunk cost… It’s what gamblers do. They throw good money after bad thinking they can turn their luck around. It’s like, “I’ve already spent this much money or time… whatever. I got to keep going!” No, there’s no reward at the end of this game.Jimmy McGill, S2.Ep1: Switch
Our clients will always be our best resource. Plus, they have ribbon candy.Jimmy McGill, S2.Ep2: Cobbler
What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? An offer you can’t understand.Jimmy McGill, S2.Ep5: Rebecca
What’s the difference between a tick and a lawyer? The tick falls off when you’re dead!Jimmy McGill, S2.Ep5: Rebecca
Whoa, whoa. Hold up. What the hell happened to you? I get it, the first rule of Fight Club, right?Jimmy McGill, S2.Ep5: Rebecca
Sometimes you have to say something out loud to hear how crazy it sounds.Jimmy McGill, S2.Ep7: Inflatable
I guess I shouldn’t be surprised I have to tell you this. But it’s probably a bad idea that you willingly talk to the police, being a criminal and all.Mike Ehrmantraut, S2.Ep2: Cobbler
Clifford Main: You play?
Jimmy McGill: Oh, I tried to learn in high school, but then I decided there were easier ways to get girls.Clifford Main, Jimmy McGill, S2.Ep2: Cobbler
Jimmy McGill: Hey Cliff, for what it’s worth, I think you’re a good guy.
Clifford Main: For what it’s worth I think you’re an a**hole.Clifford Main, Jimmy McGill, S2.Ep7: Inflatable
For 10 minutes today, Chuck didn’t hate me. I forgot what that felt like.Jimmy McGill (to Kim), S3.Ep1: Mabel
Never bad to be early, except in death and taxes and… some other things.Jimmy McGill, S3.Ep2: Witness
Here’s what’s gonna happen. One day, you’re gonna get sick, again. One of your employees is gonna find you curled up in that space blanket, take you to the hospital, hook you up to those machines that beep and whir and hurt. And this time, it’ll be too much. And you will die there. Alone.Jimmy McGill, S3.Ep3: Sunk Costs
In my experience, the bigger the lie, the harder it can be to dig out.Jimmy McGill, S3.Ep5: Chicanery
I’m not good at building s**t, you know? I’m excellent at tearing it down.Jimmy McGill, S3.Ep10: Lantern
You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? He’s done worse. That billboard! Are you telling me that a man just happens to fall like that? No. He orchestrated it! Jimmy! He defecated through a sunroof! And I saved him, and I shouldn’t have. I took him into my own firm. What was I thinking?! He’ll never change. He’ll never change. Ever since he was 9, always the same. Couldn’t keep his hands out of the cash drawer. But not our Jimmy. Couldn’t be precious Jimmy! Stealing them blind. And he gets to be a lawyer?! What a sick joke! I should have stopped him when I had the chance! And you… you have to stop him!Chuck McGill, S3.Ep5: Chicanery
This condition, to me it’s as real as that chair. It’s as real as this house. It’s as real as you. But, what if it’s not? What if it’s all in my head? And if that’s true, if it’s not real, then what have I done?Chuck McGill, S3.Ep8: Slip
Let me put your mind at ease, Jimmy. You don’t have to make up with me. We don’t have to understand each other. Things are fine the way they are. Hey. I don’t want to hurt your feelings… But the truth is you’ve never mattered all that much to me.Chuck McGill, S3.Ep10: Lantern
You know why God made snakes before he made lawyers? He needed the practice.Jimmy McGill, S4.Ep2: Breathe
I’ll show up here every second Monday of the month like clockwork. I’m gonna keep my job at the cell phone store, and in nine months and 24 days, I will get my law license back. My partner and I, we’ll get a new office. It’ll be like it was, but bigger and better. Everything will be better. I’m gonna have more clients. I’m gonna win more cases. I’m gonna be a damn good lawyer. And people are gonna know about it.Jimmy McGill, S4.Ep5: Quite a Ride
You wanna save your business? You wanna save your dignity? You’re gonna have to fight.Jimmy McGill, S4.Ep6: Piñata
I’m supposed to make a big hairy deal about my dead brother at my reinstatement hearing? How is that sincere? I don’t think about Chuck. Okay? I don’t miss Chuck. Chuck was alive, and now he’s dead, and that’s that. Finito. Life goes on. So sue me.Jimmy McGill, S4.Ep9: Wiedersehen
They’re not gonna give it to you? So what? You’re gonna take it. You’re gonna do whatever it takes. Do you hear me? You are not gonna play by the rules. You’re gonna go your own way. You’re gonna do what they won’t do. You’re gonna be smart. You are gonna cut corners, and you are gonna win. They’re on the 35th floor? You’re gonna be on the 50th floor. You’re gonna be looking down on them. And the higher you rise, the more they’re gonna hate you. Good. Good. You rub their noses in it. You make them suffer. You don’t matter all that much to them. So what? So what? Screw them. Remember… the winner takes it all.Jimmy McGill, S4.Ep10: Winner
I know what you’ve done. The Salamancas, they do not. Do you understand what I am saying? Look at me. From now on, you are mine.Gustavo 'Gus' Fring, S4.Ep2: Breathe
Jimmy McGill: There you go. Kick a man when he’s down.
Kim Wexler: Jimmy, you are always down.Jimmy McGill, Kim Wexler, S4.Ep9: Wiedersehen
Kim Wexler: Wait. Wh… Wait. Jimmy, Jimmy, what?
Jimmy McGill: S’all good, man.Kim Wexler, Jimmy McGill, S4.Ep10: Winner
I can’t go back to being Jimmy McGill. Jimmy McGill the lawyer is always gonna be Chuck McGill’s loser brother. I’m done with that. That name is burned.Jimmy McGill, S5.Ep1: Magic Man
Saul Goodman is… He’s the last line of defense for the little guy. Are you getting sold down the river? He’s a life raft. You getting stepped on, he’s a sharp stick. You got Goliath on your back, Saul’s the guy with the slingshot. He’s a righter of wrongs. He’s friend to the friendless. That’s Saul Goodman.Jimmy McGill, S5.Ep4: Namaste
You know why I didn’t take the job? Because it’s too small! I don’t care about it! It’s nothing to me! It’s a bacterium! I travel in worlds you can’t even imagine! You can’t conceive of what I’m capable of! I’m so far beyond you! I’m like a god in human clothing! Lightning bolts shoot from my fingertips!Jimmy McGill, (to Howard), S5.Ep7: JMM
It’s just little old me in my little old Suzuki Esteem. And there has never been more than 50 bucks in an Esteem in the history of Esteems. So, no one’s gonna look at me twice.Jimmy McGill, S5.Ep8: Bagman
You do not get to make up your own rules. Put on your big boy pants and face reality.Kim Wexler, (to Everett Acker), S5.Ep3: The Guy for This
If you don’t trust your men with your money, you have bigger problems than if you trust Saul Goodman.Kim Wexler, (to Lalo), S5.Ep9: Bad Choice Road
It’s not about what you want. When you’re in, you’re in.Nacho Varga, (to Jimmy), S5.Ep3: The Guy for This
I already told you what you can do with your money. You seem like a guy who can take a hint, so what are we doing?Mike Ehrmantraut, (to Gus), S5.Ep5: Dedicado a Max
I have people. I have people waiting for me. They don’t know what I do, they never will. They’re protected. But I do what I do so they can have a better life. And if I live or if I die, it really doesn’t make a difference to me as long as they have what they need. So when it’s my time to go, I will go knowing I did everything I could for them. Now, you ask me how I keep going? That’s how.Mike Ehrmantraut, (to Jimmy), S5.Ep8: Bagman
We all make our choices. And those choices, they put us on a road. Sometimes those choices seem small, but they put you on the road. You think about getting off. But eventually, you’re back on it.Mike Ehrmantraut, S5.Ep9: Bad Choice Road
You wanna be a friend of the cartel? Time to get yourself a new motto. Just Make Money.Lalo Salamanca, S5.Ep7: JMM
A dog who bites every owner he’s had can only be disciplined with a firm hand. Or put down.Gustavo 'Gus' Fring, S5.Ep9: Bad Choice Road
You gotta teach me to play golf. A lawyer should be able to play golf.Jimmy McGill, (to Kim), S6.Ep1: Wine and Roses
What Colonel Sanders is to chicken, Saul Goodman is to the law.Jimmy McGill, S6.Ep5: Black and Blue
“Crazy”? I’ll tell you what’s crazy. Fifty-year-old high school chemistry teacher comes into my office. The guy is so broke, he can’t pay his own mortgage. One year later, he’s got a pile of cash as big as a Volkswagen. That’s crazy.Jimmy McGill, (to Jeff), S6.Ep10: Nippy
It’s called mutually assured destruction. So, if I go down, you go down.Jimmy McGill, S6.Ep10: Nippy
Jimmy McGill: Well, you see an amateur. I see 170 pounds of clay ready to be molded.Jimmy McGill, (Mike Ehrmantraut: Now, listen, even if this guy was gonna live, I wouldn't go near him. He's a complete amateur.), S6.Ep11: Breaking Bad
Where do I see it ending? With me on top. Like always.Jimmy McGill, (Bill Oakley: Where do you see this ending?), S6.Ep13: Saul Gone
Eighty-six years. But with good behavior… who knows?Jimmy McGill, (Kim Wexler: Eighty-six years.), S6.Ep13: Saul Gone
If you don’t like where you’re heading, there’s no shame in going back and changing your path.Chuck McGill, (to Jimmy), S6.Ep13: Saul Gone