You don’t do this to a person, you know? You don’t walk around being fabulous when you know you’re not available.[to Ellen]
Marriage can’t work when one person is happy and the other person is miserable. Marriage is both people being equally miserable.
Let’s get you big! Bring your new best friends, Ben and Jerry, and let’s turn your ass into a helipad![to Ellen]
I’m very impressed, you’ve got little kids over here, 2-3 years old, and they’re already speaking French.[to Ellen]