I’m not insane, my mother had me tested!
I’m exceedingly smart. I graduated college at fourteen. While my brother was getting an STD, I was getting a Ph.D. Penicillin can’t take this away.
I haven’t cried this hard since Toy Story 3.
I have excellent peripheral vision. On a good day I can see my ears.
I can’t be impossible; I exist! I think what you meant to say is, ‘I give up; he’s improbable.’
At the Christmas tree lot, there was mistletoe, and she kissed me under it in public. Like we were the stars of a Tijuana sex show.
