All right, look if you absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing’s right. And that’s what deathbeds are for.
If you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.
Welcome to the real world. It sucks. You’re gonna love it.[to Rachel]
What you guys don’t understand is, for us, kissing is as important as any part of it.
You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection.[to Jill]
You know what the scariest part is? What if there’s only one woman for everybody, you know? I mean, what if you get one woman, and that’s it? Unfortunately, in my case, there was only one woman… for her.
Who’s FICA? Why’s he getting all my money?[looking at her first paycheck]
What the hell are you doing, you scared the crap out of me!
Watch now on:
Well, you know, these people are pros. They know what they’re doing. They take their time. They get the job done.[Joey Tribbiani: Your folks are really that bad, huh?]
Well, no, although I did have an imaginary friend, who… my parents actually preferred.[Monica Geller: You’re an only child, right? You don’t have any of this.]
This guy says “hello,” I wanna kill myself.[Ross Geller: Hi.]
Sounds like a date to me.[Monica Geller: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It’s just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.]
