All right, look if you absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing’s right. And that’s what deathbeds are for.
Well, no, although I did have an imaginary friend, who… my parents actually preferred.[Monica Geller: You’re an only child, right? You don’t have any of this.]
Sounds like a date to me.[Monica Geller: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It’s just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.]
Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian… Did I say that out loud?
I think, for us, kissing is pretty much like an opening act, you know? I mean, it’s like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes out.
All right, kids, I gotta get to work. If I don’t input those numbers… it doesn’t make much of a difference.
You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection.[to Jill]
Mental note: If Jill Goodacre offers you gum, you take it! If she offers you mangled animal carcass, you take it!