She shouldn’t be alone right now. Plus, you’re kinda like a young me. Deadites ruined your life and you’re hot as hell.
Pablo, I hope your weird Brujo uncle can help us out, ’cause me no likey bein’ responsible for everything bad.
Now I’m gonna kill you, just like I killed your father! I didn’t really kill your father, that just kinda sounded cool.
Normal? I forgot what that word even means.
My name is Ash Williams. I’m a hero from the future. I’m here to save the world from evil. Again.
Meet me in the men’s room in three minutes. But I gotta warn you, you’re gonna want to leave your husband for me, and I can’t let that happen. Family values.
Linda, from the moment I saw you, I realized that you were one of the only Lindas for me.
Let’s tango, b**ch!
Let’s get one thing straight, yo-yos. I kill demons, not people. Unless those people are demons, who look like people. And then I kill people, but they’re not really people, they’re demons. You understand?
Let me tell you something, Ash Williams doesn’t know the meaning of a lot of words. But I really don’t know the meaning of “fail.”
Ladies, I’m gonna be honest with you, I’m not drunk enough to know if this is good-weird or bad-weird. But I’ll get there though.
Just like old times, eh, Pablo? Except for the wife part and no Kelly. Actually, it’s not like old times at all.
