First thing I got to do is see a guy about a book. Must be some spell I can say to undo all this. The other first thing I got to do is some cardio, ’cause my heart is jackhammering like a quarterback on prom night.
One false move, and I will Second Amendment your brains all over this truck.
We’re not leaving a trail of blood and guts behind us, we’re keeping Michigan moist.
There’s one thing I learned from Ash. Shoot first, ask questions never.
Last time I was here with a girl, I was hopin’ to get laid. Didn’t quite work out that way. I did cut my own hand off with a chainsaw, though. It was a fun weekend.
If I’ve learned anything from you, Ash, it’s that if something seems too good to be true, it probably is.
I’ve always wanted to spend time in the city so nice, they named it Jacksonville.
Hey, I’m looking for a friend. He’s, uh, tall, dumb, smells like… bread. Um, oh yeah, chainsaw arm. Probably should’ve, led with that one, but…
Watch now on:
You fought this thing before. Maybe you just got to finish what you started.
Yes, I’m upset. Yes, I’m behind the wheel. Yes, I’m drunk. And maybe my license isn’t the fancy kind from the DMV. But at least I’m drunk!
Without good, there is no evil.
With all due respect, your tiny brain is a lot safer without my problems inside it.
