First thing I got to do is see a guy about a book. Must be some spell I can say to undo all this. The other first thing I got to do is some cardio, ’cause my heart is jackhammering like a quarterback on prom night.
Last time I was here with a girl, I was hopin’ to get laid. Didn’t quite work out that way. I did cut my own hand off with a chainsaw, though. It was a fun weekend.
If I’ve learned anything from you, Ash, it’s that if something seems too good to be true, it probably is.
Hey, I’m looking for a friend. He’s, uh, tall, dumb, smells like… bread. Um, oh yeah, chainsaw arm. Probably should’ve, led with that one, but…
Watch now on:
Yes, I’m upset. Yes, I’m behind the wheel. Yes, I’m drunk. And maybe my license isn’t the fancy kind from the DMV. But at least I’m drunk!