Choices, Lawrence. You know, you tell yourself you’ve been at the mercy of mine because it spares you consideration of your own. Because if you did consider your choices, you’d be confronted with a truth you could not comprehend, that no choice you ever made was your own. You have always been a prisoner. What if I told you I’m here to set you free?
This whole world is a story. I’ve read every page except the last one. I need to find out how it ends. I want to know what this all means.
What is a person but a collection of choices? Where do those choices come from? Do I have a choice? Were any of these choices ever truly mine to begin with?
That’s what I love about this place, all the secrets, all the little things I never noticed even after all these years. You know why this beats the real world, Lawrence? Real world is just chaos. It’s an accident. But in here, every detail adds up to something.
No one else sees it. This thing in me. Even I didn’t see it at first. And then one day, it was there. A stain I never noticed before, a tiny fleck of darkness. Invisible to everyone, but I could see nothing else. Until finally I understood that the darkness wasn’t some mark from something I’d done, some regrettable decision I’d made. I was shedding my skin. And the darkness was what was underneath. It was mine all along. And I decided how much of it I let into the world. I tried to do right. I was faithful, generous, kind… at least in this world. That has to count for something, right? I built a wall, and I tried to protect you, and Emily. But you saw right through it, didn’t you? You’re the only one. And for that, I am truly sorry. Because, everything you feel is true. I don’t belong to you. Or this world. I belong to another world. I always have.[to Juliet]
Humanity is a thin layer of bacteria on a ball of mud hurtling through the void. I think if there was a god, he would’ve given up on us long ago. He gave us a paradise, and we used everything up. We dug up every ounce of energy and burned it. We consume and excrete, use and destroy. Then we sit here on a neat little pile of ashes, having squeezed anything of value out of this planet, and we ask ourselves, “Why are we here?”