Monica, will you stop? This is nuts. Do you know how long it’s gonna be before you actually have to deal with this problem? I mean, you don’t even have a boyfriend yet.[Monica Geller: What if my own baby hates me? Huh? What am I gonna do then?]
Monica, relax. Go get a beer.[Joey Tribbiani]I don’t want a beer.[Monica Geller]Who said it was for you?[Joey Tribbiani]
Ironically, these are the guys who were picked last in gym.[watching sumo wrestlers on TV]
If he blows into one, does the other one get bigger? [watching Carol nursing Ben]
I’ve never heard myself sing before. I mean, except in my own head. Oh, this is so cool, now I can hear what you hear.[watching the Smelly Cat video]
I’ve been with my share of women. In fact, I’ve been with a lot of people’s share of women.[to Rachel]
I’m trying this new screening thing. You know, I figure if I’m always answering the phone, people’ll think I don’t have a life. [to Ross]
I’m telling you this thing won’t print. Yes, I pressed that button, like, 100 times! You know, for a hotline, you are not so hot.
I’m dating a man whose pool I once peed in.[to Richard]
I don’t understand, how can you be straight? I mean, you’re so smart and funny and you throw such great Academy Award parties.[to Duncan]
I don’t know what to say. I mean, you know, you’re married to someone for six years and you think you know him and then one day he says, “Oh, I’m not gay.”[to Duncan]
I don’t believe this. Is this how this relationship’s gonna work? Ross equals boss. I mean, come on, what is this, 1922?[to Rachel]