Very funny, Colin. You a stand-up comic now? Kind of ironic, because I sat you down at the match the other day.
Too much class? No such thing.
They’re designed that way. To make it easier for people to kiss my ass.[Mary: I’m sure you know that your trousers are ripped.]
There is something worse out there than being sad, and that is being alone and being sad.
There is something I should warn you of. I’m only gonna get more wonderful.[to Rebecca]
There is no greater education than travel.
Sometimes the best way to stick it to the man is go right between his legs.
Sometimes having a tough dad is exactly what drives certain fellas to become great at what they do.
Reason is powerless in the expression of love.
Old people are so wise. They’re like tall Yodas.
Oh, this sport. I’d forgotten how stressful it is when you actually give a s***.
Now, listen. You two knuckleheads have split our locker room in half. And when it comes to locker rooms, I like them just like my mother’s bathing suits. I only wanna see them in one piece, you hear?[to Jamie and Roy]