To whom it may concern, take care of this Rover. She saved my life. Watney.
Life is an endless series of train wrecks with only brief commercial-like breaks of happiness.
Ah, my old enemy… stairs.
When I found out the patriarchy wasn’t about horses, I lost interest anyway.[to Barbie]
The funny thing is, on the outside, I was an honest man, straight as an arrow. I had to come to prison to be a crook.
It’s funny how sometimes the people we remember the least make the greatest impression on us.
You should seek the services of a mental health professional. The Justice League is not very good at that part yet. Trust me.
Why are you so nice?[Wade Wilson]It costs nothing to be kind.[Nicepool]Shutting the f*** up is also free.[James ‘Logan’ Howlett]
When life gives you lemons, make pear juice and blow everyone’s minds.
Well, dying is certainly better than having to live an entire life as a moronic s***bag who thinks Taserface is a cool name.
Welcome to the MCU, by the way. You’re joining at a bit of a low point.[to Logan]
Wanna do some cocaine?[Blind Al]Hey, cocaine is the one thing that Feige said is off limits.[Wade Wilson]What about Bolivian marching powder?[Blind Al]They know all the slang terms. They have a list.[Wade Wilson]Even snowboarding?[Blind Al]Even disco dust.[Wade Wilson]White girl interrupted?[Blind Al]Even Forrest Bump.[Wade Wilson]Booger sugar?[Blind Al]I wouldn’t even try powdered gonuts.[Wade Wilson]Do you wanna build a snowman?[Blind Al]Yes. But I can’t.[Wade Wilson]
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