Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. We are delighted to have been ordered here to play for you this evening.
Get out of my way! I can spray this only once![disguised as a fireman, asking Gruber to move so she can use the fire extinguisher]
Flick the Gestapo. No, I said, Flick, the Gestapo.[on telephone]
Do not worry, it is Michelle of the Resistance. She will repeat nothing.[to Maria]
Captain Bertorelli will be here any minute. He has something for you in his trousers. On no account let him give it to you.[to René]
Can you not see that I am my father?[to a communist girl, while being disguised]
Burglars cannot be choosers.
British officers do not cuddle each other. Not when there are a lot of people watching, anyway.[to Yvette]
Between you and me, Gruber, I pray every night that Hitler doesn’t invade England. That damn British weather, it would be fatal for me with my rheumatism.
Berlin, however, is interested in the contents of your trousers.[asking Leclerc to drop them]
At these prices, I cannot afford another funeral.
As an undertaker my services are available 24 hours a day. Many middle aged men are found dead in their beds on a Sunday morning.[explains why is he always fancy dressed]