A beautiful funeral doesn’t guarantee Heaven.
I know who you are. I know what you’ve done. You took my boy away from me! You left him in that place to die! You faked his death! We had a funeral. We buried him. And now you’re asking for my help? Go to hell.
Funerals are for the living, and revising history only dilutes the lessons we should learn from it.
Most of what people say at a funeral is a wish. “They’re in a better place, they’re at peace, they’re smiling down.” People just wishing out loud.
Funerals are for the living. It’s up to the living to decide what they can and cannot bear.
That’s why funerals are usually a nightmare. Ten members of the family coming up with s*** ideas. “It’s what he would’ve wanted.”
At these prices, I cannot afford another funeral.
A month ago, I wasn’t even planning on attending my own funeral, but I really never would’ve guessed that it would suck this hard.[to Ingrid]