He’s a Trotter. What more can you say about the man? A couple of years ago I went down the local library and read some ancient manuscripts written by the Elders of Peckham. Did you know, five hundred years ago this was a green and peaceful area? The old Earl of Peckham had a castle where the Kwik-Fit exhaust centre now stands. Flaxon-haired maidens used to dance round the village maypole of an evening. And then one fateful medievil day, the Trotter clan arrived in a stolen Zephyr. Before you knew it the flaxon-haired maidens were up the spout, the old Earl had been sold some hooky armour and someone nicked the maypole. A hundred years after that, the Black Death arrived in England. The people of Peckham thought their luck had changed.[to Mike]
I know just the bloke. He had a family bereavement recently. He could do with a good laugh.[Del Boy: Listen, do you reckon you could get one of your mechanics to have a look at my van?]
It’s amazing, innit? Everything you buy off him has got something missing.[although Del Boy promised Boycie a baby boy, he can only deliver a girl]
If Elsie Partridge really could raise the dead, half the money lenders in Peckham would be employing her.
Yeah, you can still see the bomb damage on some of them.[Raquel: You should have more respect, Mike. Those women went through a war for us.]
Trigger doesn’t have many friends or opportunities for social outlet. Every weekend he goes down to the park and throws bread to the ducks. To him it’s a dinner party. So, during the week he has a straight choice between sitting in the cemetery or sitting in this pub. Unfortunately, the cemetery closes at six.
Medals for road sweepers! Good God, they’ll be giving Del Boy an award for good taste next.[to Trigger]
I might be able to con people into buying my cars, I might be able to convince them that you conceived and gave birth in seven days flat, but how the hell am I gonna persuade them that my grandad was Louis Armstrong?[to Marlene, Anna’s baby girl turns out to be black]
How dare you! Murdered my wife and buried her in the garden? I have never been so insulted in all my life. You know how much I’ve spent on that garden? You think I’m going to dig a hole in it?[Del Boy: Well Boycie, I hope you won’t take offence by what I’m about to say, but me and Rodney think you’ve murdered Marlene and buried her in the garden.]
Have you ever spent an evening in Trigger’s flat? It’s like having a seance with Mr. Bean.[to Raquel]