How is knocking out a deterrent? Everyone wants to be knocked out. Nobody wants to be dead.
Holy s***. I’m a terrible father.
Here’s some things an adventure needs, Beth. Conflict, stakes, a way for me to benefit, and, clearly, Morty.
Great, now I have to take over a whole planet because of your stupid boobs.[to Summer]
Everyone can change their nature, Morty. It’s what defines our species. Look at Iron Man. That actor was an animal in the ’90s, literally waking up in bushes. His agent had to catch him with a butterfly net.
Dreams move one-hundredth the speed of reality, and dog time is one-seventh human time. So, you know, every day here is like a minute. It’s like “Inception,” Morty, so if it’s confusing and stupid, then so is everyone’s favorite movie.
Don’t waste your brain on those weirdos, Unity. They’re no different from any of the aimless chumps that you occupy. They just put you at the center of their lives because you’re powerful. And then because they put you there, they want you to be less powerful.
Don’t hate the player, hate the game, son.[to Jerry]
Don’t get drawn into the culture, Morty. Stealing stuff is about the stuff, not the stealing.
Crazy things happen when you put in the work.
Can somebody just let me out of here? If I die in a cage, I lose a bet.
Buy another one, Morty. Consume, Morty. Nobody’s out there shopping with this f***ing virus.
