It’s a gift to share something hard with someone you love. Means you care about them enough to let them help you.[to Asta]
It was D’arcy.[Asta Twelvetrees]She would not steal a bomb. There is not even any vodka in it.[Harry Vanderspeigle]
It is true that helping others is the most important thing humans can do. Maybe saying thank you is the second most important.
It is human nature, not alien nature. We do not care if our children die, as long as they die in a ditch and not in the road where they will make it bumpy for our vehicles. Selfish children.[to Asta]
If you love someone, you’re never really apart. They’re a part of you, and you’re a part of them, and they can never leave you.
If you have the right person on your team, they do not hold you back. They lift you up.
If I have learned one thing from meeting with the generals, it is that mating is like war. You cannot sit around and wait. You have to take action.
I’m not an alien anymore. I’m just a human man trying to backdoor a human woman.
I’m nocturnal and dayturnal. The real word is “diurnal,” but I changed it because “diurnal” sounds like where Germans piss.
I’m going to stick my hand up your ass and puppet you like you belong on public television.
I would grow a mustache as a disguise, but then I’d have to get a job as a firefighter or a pedophile.
I will do what human failures do. I will ignore my horrible life by being a parent and passing my resentments on to my children.
