Not one person who has ever accomplished anything of worth in life has ever been happy.
You sing?[Susie Myerson]You know I sing.[Tess Dooley]When did I ever hear you sing? [Susie Myerson]In all the school plays. Don’t you remember me doing The Band Wagon in high school?[Tess Dooley]I remember you doing the band back in high school, but not you singing.[Susie Myerson]
You know what I discovered today? You can take your kids to the airport, put them on a plane, and just fly them somewhere else. Technology is amazing. It used to be, for that kind of peace and quiet, you had to leave your kids on the steps of a church.
You don’t take my calls, you won’t call me back. What are we, married?[to David]
We teach, yes, but we foist. I certainly do. I think I emerged from my mother’s womb giving advice on how to deal with the umbilical cord.
This is very serious. I mean, if this gets out, every working woman will want to get paid just as much as a man to do the exact same job, and our entire civilization will collapse.[to Mike]
This is a record of every generation of first-born Weissman men and their accomplishments. And prepare yourself. It’s a barn-burner. We’ve got doctors, lawyers, scientists, kings, at least one oboist, five writers, an archaeologist, one very creative murderer…[to Joel]
The great thing about owning a club is that all the things that made you look like a loser before are now part of your job.
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That’s the nice thing about the Jews. We only hijack a conversation.
Okay, news flash. This is show business, lady.[Susie Myerson]You lied to me.[Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel]That’s show business, too.[Susie Myerson]
Of course they do. I start every paper reading the corrections. That’s how you know who the idiots are.[Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel: Does anyone really read corrections?]
No one knows what Being and Nothingness is, Sartre doesn’t even know. Even I’m just pretending to read it.[Rose Weissman: She’s not going to know what Being and Nothingness is, even if she’s curious about the text.]
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Videos:
