Welcome to life. It’s a big boat with a lot of holes, but we’re all in it together.
Life is a subscription, and Thanksgiving is your family’s yearly charge.
Lies pile up. Like credit card debt. You retain an advantage by staying liquid.
8% of anything is expendable. 8% of pizza is crust. 8% of the Snyder cut was Batman dreaming.
You may be the single dumbest human I’ve ever met, but you still have a right to take whatever you want seriously.[to Jerry]
This guy, Morty, he hates being found but loves building elaborate s***. Like playing a ton of “Minecraft,” but all on a private server.
These fortunes are so basic. Why wouldn’t you use this power to change the world? Or at least get Nintendo to make a portable VR headset?
That’s why I removed myself. I’ve become the thing I hate. It’s like a Netflix drama down here, and I don’t mean an accidentally good one, I mean a regular-ass Netflix drama.[to Morty]
Watch now on:
That’s what happens when you let people in and they stop respecting you. They touch your s***, they screw things up, they kill your f***ing family.[to Morty]
That’s the point of tradition, doing things for no reason.
Only people who have really f***ed up in the past have to virtue signal this hard. Look at Sean Penn.
If these guys wanted my respect, they could’ve just gotten a liquor license.
