Kids, breakfast and school. If we don’t at least pretend they matter, everything falls apart.
Geez, Rick. People be f***ing each other’s wives, huh?[Morty Smith]Marriage is a scam, Morty.[Rick Sanchez]
The easiest way out of any box is to be the least shaped like a box.
You can be great or you can be around forever.
Will someone mute the goddamn news? If I want a list of my failures, I’d dig up my mother.
Underestimating people only gives them the high ground.
See, this is why religion sucks. Infinite energy, and the Pope uses it to levitate like Criss Angel.
Rick, thanks for coming. We’ve got a situation in the state of Virginia.[The President]Bigfoot?[Rick Sanchez]That’s Montana.[The President]Nazis?[Rick Sanchez]That’s, uh…everywhere.[The President]
Watch now on:
Morty gets everything for free![Summer Smith]Morty is a dog! People have cats because their affection is earned. I treat you like an equal because I respect you.[Rick Sanchez]
It wasn’t the death, was it?[Morty Smith]It was the complexity of life.[Rick Sanchez]
I am so sick of this “born smart” s***. I was born crying and pissing myself, just like you. Then I became the smartest man in the universe, and do I get credit? No, I get to check my brain privilege.[to Jerry]
Cells consume. Life itself is wrong, and that means death is right. But you can’t side with that. So you live, even when it means eating.[to Morty]
