Don’t you want John to grow up to be a sexually healthy adult?[Blaire Bennett]Blaire, language.[Susan Bennett]My parents never talked to me about sеx. I figured it all out on my own, and I’m doing just fine.[Blaire Bennett]We’ll talk to John.[Susan Bennett]
Don’t you wanna earn Schrute Bucks?[Dwight Schrute]No. In fact, I’ll give you a billion Stanley Nickels if you never talk to me again.[Stanley Hudson]What’s the ratio of Stanley Nickels to Schrute Bucks?[Dwight Schrute]The same as the ratio of unicorns to leprechauns.[Stanley Hudson]
Don’t even joke about hooking up with guys who ride Vespas.[to Alice]
Do you know what rust does to a boat?[Leonard Green]It gives it a nice antiquey look?[Ross Geller]Rust is boat cancer, Ross.[Leonard Green]Wow, I’m sorry. When I was a kid, I lost a bike to that.[Ross Geller]
Do you know how much this place would be in New York?[Tina Manfredi]No, not without bars on the window.[Dwight Manfredi]
Do you ever notice that being friends with you is bad for people’s health?[to Charles]
Do not disrespect my dead father, who I just murdered.
Do aristocrats make good politicians?[Declan O’Hara]Plenty of them have. My family has a strong sense of moral duty. I inherited that with the house.[Rupert Campbell-Black]
Did you ever notice he’s the only motherf***er who can smoke a cigarette in the rain with his hands tied behind his back? That nose is like a natural canopy.
Deputy, it’s never the ones you expect. Trust me. I done seen enough depraved sexual behaviors and appetites for a lifetime.[Mike Thompson]Was that when you were in Vice?[Liv Baker]No, Tampa.[Mike Thompson]
Delusional narcissist.[Ted]Excuse me?[Blaire Bennett]Note to self, stop saying what you write.[Ted]
Dad, are any of your friends alive?[Harold Weir: You know, there was a girl in our school… She had premarital sex. You know what she did on graduation day? Died! Of an overdose. Heroin.]